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Dont's in bringing up your children

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1) Do not impose your will on them: Sometimes you have to allow your children to make their own choices and decisions. Even if they make mistakes, they will learn from it. You will then use it as an opportunity to sit down with them and talk with them concerning their choices and the consequences. Don’t always mandate your children to go your way. Simply do your part by teaching them what is right and wrong using the Bible as your basis, commend them to God and let Him lead them. God is our ultimate example. He doesn’t impose His will on us that was why He gave us a freewill but He before that He had laid bare before us right and wrong, life and death but had instructed us to choose life. Do same for your children. If you don’t, your children may turn out rebellious and hypocritical. Once they are outside your watch, they become something else. Could this be the reason why most Pastors children lead double lives because their parents are trying so hard to impose their expectations as Pastors children on them and in so doing drive them further away from God into the world than close to Him?
2) Do not be harsh or hard on them: It spews rebellion fueled with hate.
3)Do not have favorites among your children: Yes. Don't love or prefer a child above another or you will become partial in attending to their needs.
4)Do not compare your children with themselves: I have seen parents who keep referring to one child as better than the other. They go as far as lashing out to the child, "Why can't you be like your other sibling?" . You will be only provoking your child to anger by saying that or it can make the child in question feel inferior to her 'better' sibling and that whatever she does isn't good enough. It can push her to look for love in the wrong places, places where she feels accepted. Please understand that each of your children are unique and should be treated specially. Even if one is better in character than the other(s), don't rub it into her face rather encourage her and correct her in love and always use Christ as the standard not her sibling.


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