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'I was living on eggshells..' - Woman chronicles her domestic abuse story

"I want to tell my story so that other women and men who are going through the same things that I went through can know that they are not alone, and it is something that is rampant in our society. 

"Domestic abuse is not just physical violence and beatings, it can be emotional and verbal, and although you are not covered in cuts and bruises, you still have scars. My body would be covered in them if you could see them.
 
"When I met my ex-partner I thought I had met my Prince Charming, he just swept me off my feet. But over the years I went from feeling like this lucky woman who had found her soul-mate, to feeling completely worthless and broken.


"My partner was a narcissist, which meant that he was extremely self-centered, hollow and always acted like he was the victim. His behavior was very controlling and manipulative, but he did it in a very clever way, where he made me feel that I was at fault for any arguments and issues in our relationship. Nothing could ever be his fault.

"Even though we lived in the same house and slept in the same bed, he would ignore me for weeks sometimes, but whenever we were out in public or with our friends he would act like a perfect gentleman, as if he was the image of a perfect husband.

"That would immediately stop as soon as we got home because there was always something that I had done that he needed to have a go at me about.

"I felt as though I was living my life walking on eggshells, because everything that I seemed to do was wrong. I found that I was changing my own behaviour just so that I wouldn't upset him, and there also seemed to be one rule for him and another for me, he was so hypocritical.

"There was one occasion that really stands out to me that resulted in him not speaking to me for more than three weeks.

"I was out with my friend getting my nails done, and we both decided to have them done with this nice red nail varnish. I never thought that there would be an issue with this, because even though I remembered that he said he wasn't the biggest fan of it, I reckoned that it was just having my nails done, it wasn't a big deal.

"I want to tell my story so that other women and men who are going through the same things that I went through can know that they are not alone, and it is something that is rampant in our society.

"Domestic abuse is not just physical violence and beatings, it can be emotional and verbal, and although you are not covered in cuts and bruises, you still have scars. My body would be covered in them if you could see them.

"When I met my ex-partner I thought I had met my Prince Charming, he just swept me off my feet. But over the years I went from feeling like this lucky woman who had found her soul-mate, to feeling completely worthless and broken.

"My partner was a narcissist, which meant that he was extremely self-centred, hollow and always acted like he was the victim. His behaviour was very controlling and manipulative, but he did it in a very clever way, where he made me feel that I was at fault for any arguments and issues in our relationship. Nothing could ever be his fault.

"Even though we lived in the same house and slept in the same bed, he would ignore me for weeks sometimes, but whenever we were out in public or with our friends he would act like a perfect gentleman, as if he was the image of a perfect husband.

"That would immediately stop as soon as we got home because there was always something that I had done that he needed to have a go at me about.

"I felt as though I was living my life walking on eggshells, because everything that I seemed to do was wrong. I found that I was changing my own behaviour just so that I wouldn't upset him, and there also seemed to be one rule for him and another for me, he was so hypocritical.

"There was one occasion that really stands out to me that resulted in him not speaking to me for more than three weeks.

"I was out with my friend getting my nails done, and we both decided to have them done with this nice red nail varnish. I never thought that there would be an issue with this, because even though I remembered that he said he wasn't the biggest fan of it, I reckoned that it was just having my nails done, it wasn't a big deal.

"I soon found out that it was a big deal for him, because the moment I got home and he saw my nails a huge argument erupted, where he was shouting at me about how I had deeply hurt and offended him with the red nail varnish and he didn't speak to me for over three weeks.
 
"On another occasion we were at a dinner party with friends, and he spent the whole time acting like this lovely man with a great sense of humor, but even though we were sat right beside each other, he did not say one word to me the entire night. My friends said to me they were shocked when they thought back on it, because why would a loving husband act like that?

"The worst times were around my birthday, Christmas and other special events, we could never have a nice time, there were always arguments and they were always my fault.

"Even going on my annual holiday with my friends turned into a war, because even though I did it every year, it was somehow a horrendous thing for me to do, and I swear I spent more time arguing about me going on a holiday than the length of the trip itself."

She described the relationship in the beginning as being very "up and down", where things would be amazing one day then horrible the next. But as the years went by, the "ups stopped being so high and the lows just got even worse".

She said: "I was constantly being accused of being unfaithful, and he would always make things up, to the point where I honestly believe he thought that his lies were true.

"I found myself never wanting to leave work, because if I was hiding there then I was safe from all of the arguments and abuse. A person should not have to live like that."

*Hmmm

Comments

  1. No human being deserves this kind of treatment from another human period!

    ReplyDelete

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